Random Music: "Shambala" by B.W. Stevenson, by Three Dog Night, and by Rockapella

One of the few popular songs from my childhood that has left an impression on me to this day, Shambala has been one of those rare musical enigmas ... a catchy tune that charted in the same year under two separate performers. In 1973, it charted Number 66 for B.W. Stevenson and, a few weeks later, Number 3 for Three Dog Night.

B.W. Stevenson's version is not quite as slickly produced as Three Dog Night's. It definitely has a country twang to it. It starts a half step lower then, in the last verse, it augments up a half step into a key we more recognize. And instead of "ooo", he gives us "yay-ee". But, in its own right, it is a strong recording. Take a listen for yourself.


As mentioned already, the song broke the Top 100 twice in the same year by two different performers. Still despite its popularity, it rarely has been covered since 1973. Usually songs that prove to be so infectious will be recorded many times over. Perhaps it is because Three Dog Night's recording is viewed as the de facto version. Perhaps it is because the subject matter, of one's journey to enlightenment, hasn't necessarily been culturally relevant since the early 1970's. Perhaps it is because the song is so goddamned difficult to sing!

Whatever the reason, the Three Dog Night recording is the most prevalent and the one that comes to mind.


But!

In my scouring of the Internets, I have found another version. This one was recorded in 2002 by the a capella singing group Rockapella on their album Smilin'. It is familiar insomuch as it's "Shambala". (I mean, really, how much can you change a song before you irreparably "re-imagine" it into something completely different and new?) Rockapella's interpretation, in my opinion, embodies in tone and execution how I imagine a path to spiritual growth would be. (As a "Recovering Baptist", I haven't devoted much time to growing spiritually in a long while so I don't really know what it would be like. But that's a post for another day ... perhaps.)

As much as I still love the Three Dog Night version and as much as it will always hold a dear place in my heart, I have to admit that Rockapella's version has become my favorite version of this song.

What say you?

Since I'm Awake - Ten Random Thoughts

1. Insomnia is evil and needs to be destroyed. Where's the government funding for this project?
   
2. Feelings and emotions are necessary elements of life. But it doesn't mean I have to like them.
3. "Notes From The Frozen Bar" on The Knowledgemonger's site is an absolute Must Read!
4. Dance music doesn't have the same affect outside of the nightclub.
5. Did I mention that insomnia sucks?
6. Sharing feelings and emotions is even worse than having them. I mean, c'mon, who wrote these rules? Isn't there an annual peer review process?
7. "Hey, hey ... we're da Monkees. People say we monkey 'round. What of it?"
8. Insomnia. Yeah.
9. Having music playing in a vehicle that all passengers can hear is an absolute necessity.
10. I'm not one to wax poetic or drop clichés but. Love is a rare resource in this world. Share it when you have it. Recognize it when you see it. Accept it when you feel it.

... Wants To Know ...

... Why He Does This.

The Boo-Bugs Are Already Out

Remember when I dropped this sweet bit of news on you last month? I was so terribly excited. So you were, deep down inside. You can admit it; we're all friends here and this is a safe place.

You weren't? You're concerned about the second post-Hobbit movie ... the one that doesn't occur anywhere in Tolkien's tomes?

Join the club ...

Insomnia And Late (Late) Television

I've already blogged about this but it was on again tonight and, as before, I laughed my arse off.

Thank you, Craig! Again!

Rachael Ray, Yasir Arafat, And Michelle Malkin (Or "... Mmm ... Forbidden Doughnut ...")

Conservative blogger Michelle Malkin seems to think that Rachael Ray chose her fashions poorly for a Dunkin' Donuts commercial. Bowing to pressure, Dunkin' Donuts pulled the ad.

Ms. Malkin thought that Rachael's scarf resembled a kaffiyeh, stating that she was "hoping her hate couture choice was spurred more by ignorance than ideology". Dunkin's Sr. VP for Communications Margie Myers disagreed, stating that it "was selected by a stylist for the advertising shoot" and that "asolutely no symbolism was intended".

What do you think? Did RR make an unforgivable fashion faux pas or is MM off her gourd?

Here's a picture of RR from the commercial wearing her scarf and a picture of Yasir Arafat wearing his kaffiyeh. You decide.

Image of Rachael Ray taken from the Michelle Malkin post linked in the post.

Image of Yasir Arafat taken from this Foreign Affairs site.

Multiracial In America

MSNBC posted an article today addressing multiracial Americans and how Mr. Obama's race for the Presidency has drawn more focused attention to them.

My reaction to this article is simple ...

... multiracial Americans have been around since the first generation of natural-born Americans.

What? Just because the majority of multiracial Americans now have more white features than the "modern multiracial movement" iteration means that we don't count?

I call shenanigans.

America is a multiracial nation filled with multiracial citizens. Always has been. Always will be. Articles like this do nothing to bring us more together. It is just another way to divide us.

Captain's Quarters? No! Historic Black Figures' Quarters!

Remember when I told you this a few weeks ago?

The day you have been eagerly anticipating has finally arrived and we are now able to vote on our favorite design from a mediocre group. Voting is occurring on the District of Columbia Office of the Secretary website!

What's that you say? Voting is limited to District residents?

Of course it is ...

... or is it?

(Just remember, the idea to cheat the system was not planted in your impressionable brain here. Blame DCist.)

Git 'Er Dun!

This on-again-off-again dance with professional sports teams makes the District look the fool, from my perspective. It has been my long-standing opinion that having and keeping professional sports teams, regardless of how niche they may be, within the city boundaries is in the District's long-term interest. Having such entertainment unique to the city (and not running off to a suburb rival ... *cough Redskins cough*) is one of the many things that draws people to the city. Once here, especially if the surrounding area has been wisely developed, said people drawn to the city will stick around for a while before and after the game, spending money inside the city limits.

Wise people understand that money spent now is money made later.

And it looks like unwise people are finally understanding that too.

As with everything in the District, there are supporters and there are critics. Both voices should be heard but, in the end, the long-term interests of the city should be the deciding factor.

Is another stadium more important that improving our public schools? Absolutely not. However one should not be sacrificed at the expense of the other. Besides, it appears as though our publics schools are finally in the capable hands of a chancellor who is willing and able to make the tough decisions for the betterment of our failing education system. Instead of begging for more money to feed this bloated beast (as has been the modus operandi with past chancellors), Chancellor Rhee is performing the surgeries necessary to remove the tapeworms that have been eating the monstrous amounts of money already being given to the system.

Besides, the money being allocated to help finance the soccer stadium is coming from the money made at the baseball stadium ... money that would not even exist were it not for former Mayor Anthony Williams' and Councilmember Jack Evans' resolve.

Here's to hoping that this current City Council and this current Mayor have the same resolve to get this deal done, too.

Random Music: "Resurrection" by Mario Spinetti

I've written, briefly, about the artist featured this week. Of the six songs on Mario Spinetti's current EP, [1/1], my favorite song is "Resurrection".

Again, the artist doesn't spell out what the song means so it is left up to each listener's interpretation. To see what is being sung, check the lyrics on Mario's MySpace blog. (It is possible that MySpace is blocked at your employment site. You may have to wait until you get home.)

To me (because I couldn't tell you what it means to anyone else ... duh), the song speaks to wanting to give up yet soldiering on. Everyone I know, including myself (if you haven't been paying attention up 'til now), has moments when life seems too hard, when the weight of duties and expectations seem too heavy, when all we want to do is crawl into a hole and die. But something stronger calls to us ... whether that be rediscovered inner light, the calming salve of a friendly word, bone-headed stubbornness, whatever ... that gives us the strength to stand up again, dust off the caked-on crap, and forge ahead.

This song is on a heavy rotation on my playlist. I hope you find inspiration in it as well. (And that you discover a love for Mario, too.)

Twitter And Insomnia

Damn you, Tuffie!

If You Don't Like The System, Stop Coming. It Won't Hurt My Feelings Or Our Business One Bit.

Look, I do understand that you waited a long time to sing tonight. You weren't the only one who waited a long time to sing tonight. Unfortunately, we ran out of time and were not able to get to you. You weren't the only one we weren't able to get to. You were, however, the only one who was a cunt. You and your friend. So you want to whine to management about how "bad business"-like it was for us not to allow you to sing because we ran out of time? Be my guest. If you've been participating at karaoke for longer than I've been working, I'm sure you would know how things work on busy three-day weekends. But I somehow doubt that you're a regular (as I am a regular, years before I started working there, and don't recall ever seeing you there).

So, please, cry to the general manager about how unfair I was tonight. But realize that you are the only one who reacted this way. Everyone else seemed to understand that it was an extremely busy night and didn't get up in my grill over it.

Bitch.

Dear Network Conglomerate Advertisers ...

... if you're going to suck up to us to get us to partake of your product, at least wear our colors.

Thanks,
A Consumer

A Gorgeous Sunday

So I was supposed to spend time with family today but went to the Nats game instead. (Thanks, Budsky, for the tix.) It's nothing against my family; I love them dearly. It's just that our tickets weren't exactly cheap and so needed to be used. Besides, it's good to spend positive time with someone I still hold dear. (Thanks, Tuffie, for accepting all last minute like, as this was.)

I hope you all enjoyed your glorious Sunday as well.

Random Music: "The Becoming" by Nine Inch Nails

This week's song should serve as another small window into my inner workings.

A lot of people know me. But not many people know me. And of those few numbers, perhaps maybe three people know me. That is because I find it hard to trust people with those most intimate parts of me. It's something I've tried to work on, with minor success. After all of these years, I am still a work in progress.

Because of my lack of emotion and because of the distance I keep from people, I've been described as robotic, soulless, Vulcan. I understand those tags but I just don't agree with them. (I feel very deeply though you just wouldn't know it.) Still, there are times when I become so frustrated with my life and hurt by the things in it that I "shut down". I can't explain in my own words what I think, what I go through internally, when I close off.

An album by Nine Inch Nails titled The Downward Spiral speaks to me. But a particular song explains my consciousness at those moments of distance very well. It is in the buildup of tension and confusion among the music and sound effects. It is in the sudden calm in the middle, then the sudden calamity, then the sudden calm again at the end. It is in the lyrics, with such example:

The me that you know, he used to have feelings.
But the blood has stopped pumping and he is left to decay.
The me that you know is now made up of wires;
And even when I'm right with you, I'm so far away.

I don't know what Trent Reznor was thinking when he wrote this song. I haven't been able to find anything anywhere where Mr. Reznor explains the song. So it is open to interpretation. You've read mine. Now here is the song.

WARNING: In case you missed it, this is Nine Inch Nails. Trent Reznor isn't known for writing idyllic tunes about clouds and puppies. This song may be disturbing to the sensitive. You have been warned.

The Washington Post's 2008 Post Hunt

"Wait ... that's not the Geico Gecko!"

On a damp, cool afternoon, Washington D.C. experienced something new to the city ... The Post Hunt. This exercise in cerebral gymnastics was created by Dave Barry, Gene Weingarten and Tom Shroder. It is an off-shoot of The Herald Hunt, created by Dave Barry and Tom Shroder when they worked at The Miami Herald.

The turnout for this event was pretty impressive for a first year. I would estimate about 250 people showed, which comprised of locals from VA/DC/MD and visitors from FL who participated in past Herald Hunts. The object was simple ... solve clues to win the hunt.

The six games involved in solving the clues were not as simple.

Only six items were needed to compete in this free event - a copy of Sunday's Washington Post Magazine, a pencil, a piece of paper, a cell phone, your thinking cap, and a healthy sense of humor. If you didn't have a copy of the Post Magazine (because you're a cheap bastard), one was provided to you at the starting site. If you didn't have any of the other items ... well, you were SOL.

I was on a team comprising of myself, Peanut, Alpha Male, and Roommate Of Alpha Male. (Trust me, peeps, those nicknames are much less wordy and far easier to type than the ones they used to have.) Alpha Male and Roommate were fully prepared and had even tried to decipher some of the clues earlier in the morning (in lieu of sleeping, apparently). Peanut and I were not as prepared ... as I am both cheap and forgetful ... so we didn't get our Post Magazine until we arrived at the starting point.

I won't regale you with a play-by-play of the whole event. You can see the six games and their answers on the official website (and so understand the torture that we all went through yesterday). Instead, I'll cover some thoughts:

• Comics who have to follow a script for a hunt aren't as funny as you would expect. But children who ad lib are hilarious!
  
• The Washington Nationals Presidents rock!
  
• A male ruminant is fast.
  
• Reading comprehension is FUNdamental.
• Booing Dave, Tom, and Gene at any and every opportunity is a Herald Hunt tradition and is explicitly encouraged by Dave, Tom, and Gene.
• Coconut fortune cookies are very tasty.
  
• Dave Barry is as funny in person as he is in writing.
• I didn't think about getting Dave Barry's autograph until just now.
  
• Some people don't know the difference between a crossword puzzle and a scavenger hunt.
• I love Peanut and Alpha Male. And Roommate Of Alpha Male isn't too bad, either.
  
• Everyone loves Journey.
  
• The endgame was FAR too complicated and required thinking not only outside of the box but outside of reason.
  
• Which means that the players on the teams that actually solved all six games should be institutionalized.
  

All in all, I am very proud of my teammates. We solved the first five games fairly quickly and easily. Each person on our team provided extremely valuable input ... no one person dominated. Ours was truly a team effort. If we had understood how to think like the organizers better before the hunt, I think we would have placed in the top three. (Are we all in agreement here, teammates?) It was a fun five hours spent with people I wish I could spend time with together more often.

I do hope that the Post makes this an annual tradition. It's a great way to spend a day in the city. It's great exercise, both mental and physical. It's a great way to see parts of the city you may not otherwise see. It's a great excuse to spend time with friends. In short, The Post Hunt is just great!

Happy Bike To Work Day!

Yes, today is that made up environmental holiday, Bike To Work Day! You couldn't have picked a better day for it. Honestly.

(Okay, not honestly. But I'm sure you're expert enough to bicycle, hold an umbrella, and watch out for those lunatic D.C. cab drivers.)

This One's For You (You Know Who You Are)

Random Music: "Young Blood" by Bruce Willis

In the 1980's, it was the hip thing to do for actors to release albums. Most of them ... how can I say ... made cute little puppies within doggie-ear-shot commit suicide. (There was an insanely high number of car accidents involving dogs ... really ... look it up.)

But once in a while, an actor would release a perfectly passable album. In 1987, one Bruce Willis (yes, that Bruce Willis) did just that with his album "The Return Of Bruno". It has quite a few gems, including admirable covers of "Under the Boardwalk" and "Secret Agent Man". Seriously, you really should get this record and enjoy it for the good time that it is.

But back on track, my favorite song on the whole album is "Young Blood". Why?, you might be wondering. It isn't the most famous song listed. It's a by-the-book ditty that doesn't stand out much from any other song produced during the Decade Of Decadence. That is all true. But this song has one of the best lines ever written to music ...

Look, get your hands off my daughter before I play a little Hank Aaron melody on your head, y'understand?!

How can you not love that? Enjoy!

Political Public Service Announcement

I'm sure a good number of you out there are still awaiting a winner in the Clinton-Obama slugfest. I frankly don't care because, well, Democrats are idiots.

Oh, was that too un-PC? Tough. If you morons would just choose the best candidate for your party instead of slicing yourselves up into little focus-group pieces, maybe you'd win more than one important election in a row. But no. You women keep voting Hillary because she's a woman. And you blacks keep voting Barak because he's black. And you homos keep voting for whomever you think is the most fag-friendly. And you white males ... keep sitting on the couch.

Not that Republicans are any better. You had the chance to nominate a killer candidate. But instead you picked McCain. Thanks.

Anyway, lest you feel that your choices are Iraq and A Hard Place, you're wrong. The beauty of our democratic process is that there are more than two parties. And you have more than two choices.

Former Republican Rep. Bob Barr launched a Libertarian Party presidential bid Monday, saying voters are hungry for an alternative to the status quo who would dramatically cut the federal government.

I'm not saying he's a great choice either ... I have no idea what his policy positions are yet. What I am saying is that you have options. Study each candidate running very closely. Understand what they think and what direction they would like to steer our country. Make sure, come November when you pull that lever, that you are making an informed decision.

I Love Sinfest

You should love Sinfest, too.

Untitled

I'm tired. Of putting myself in no-win situations. Of setting myself up for disappointment. Of allowing myself to be hurt.

I'm also tired of venting my spleen in cryptic posts on this site. So instead of telling you how upset I am at things, I will instead share with you one of my favorite jokes.

So, Mickey and Minnie Mouse are in couple's counseling. Mickey responds indignantly to the counsellor, "I never said she was crazy. I said she was fucking Goofy."

Random Music: "The Saga Of John Henry" by The Smothers Brothers

I have been a fan of The Smothers Brothers from the moment I first heard them. The banter between them is so easy ... which makes sense, they being brothers and all. My humor, at least the parts that go for the easy stupid joke, was inspired by Tommy.

Anyway, I think my favorite recorded skit from them is a piece about John Henry. It's a song and story that just about everyone knows. But Tommy's storytelling is fantastic. And, if you listen closely, you can hear Dick caught off-guard ... something I'm sure that happened a lot during their many years of performing together.

Here, for you, is "The Saga Of John Henry" as performed by Tom and Dick Smothers. I hope you like it as much as I do.

Our Tax System Explained: Bar Stool Economics

DISCLAIMER: This post is borrowed from a viral e-mail I received from a good friend today. And by borrowed, I mean plagiarized. Enjoy.

Ten men went out for beer and the bill for all ten came to $100. They agreed to pay their bill in the following way:

• The first four men (the poorest) paid nothing.
  
• The fifth paid $1.
  
• The sixth paid $3.
  
• The seventh paid $7.
  
• The eighth paid $12.
  
• The ninth paid $18.
  
• The tenth man (the richest) paid $59.
  

The ten men drank in the same bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement. Then, one day, they were approached by the owner of the bar.

"Since you are all such good customers," he said, "I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20. Drinks for the ten of you will now cost just $80."

Since it was such a wonderful arrangement, the men still wanted to pay their bill in the same manner they always had. So how could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his fair share? They realized that $20 divided by ten is $2. But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the first four men, the fifth man, and the sixth man would all end up being paid to drink his beer. So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay. It worked out like this:

• The first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free.
  
• The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
  
• The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
  
• The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
  
• The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
  
• The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
  
• The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).
  

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.

"I only got a dollar out of the $20," declared the sixth man as he pointed to the tenth man, "but he got $10!"

"Yeah, that's right," exclaimed the fifth man. "I only saved a dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I got!"

"'That's true!" shouted the seventh man. "Why should he get $10 back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!"

"'Wait a minute," yelled the first four men in unison. "We didn't get anything at all. This system exploits the poor!"

The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.

The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks so the nine sat down and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start doing business overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.

For those who understand, no explanation is needed. For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.

At Long Last, Here They Are

The designs for the District quarters, which we originally were not going to have, have been unveiled. I know what my preference would be. Which is yours?

Late (Late) Night Laughter

I am an insomniac at times, as those of you who know me know. As such, I get to watch "quality" late night television. (Okay, most of it isn't quality.) One of the shows I love watching is The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. I enjoyed him as Nigel Wick on The Drew Carey Show, but his new role as talk show host is priceless. Anyhoo, one of Craig's guests on Monday's program was Ewan MacGregor. I have to say that this was one of the funniest appearances on a talk show that I've seen in ages; I laughed during the entire thing. Here, see what I mean ...



After the interview, Craig did a segment called "ESPNUK". Just watch ...

Oh. My. God. Yes!

Forgive my geek-out but this news is sweet, sweet music to my ears. Not only is Peter Jackson producing and writing these movies, as has already been reported, but he's tagged one of the most visual and creative people out there to direct them. If you aren't familiar with who this person is, you should be ashamed and then you should check out one of his movies ... most particularly this one.

*bloggy love to Jimmie at The Sundries Shack for the heads-up on this.

Run Silent, Run Deep

I do apologize for all of these personal posts lately. I certainly did not plan to spill my spleen the way I have been but that's the way things are sometimes. This will be that last personal post for a while. In fact, it will be the last post for the near future.

I have been feeling increasingly detached from people and things over the past few weeks. Recent events haven't helped much in that regard. It's not that anything is wrong, it's just that something isn't right. So I'm going to be taking some serious me time to reassess myself and my place in the cosmos.

If you're starving for online content to read, you can gloss over my previous posts (if you haven't already) or I recommend that you visit the fine blogs listed in my Blogroll to the right there.

Social Rules Of Behavior [EXPLICIT]

I feel it is my bounded duty to point out some rules of behavior to those of you how are ... how shall I say ... inter-personally challenged. Follow these simple start-up rules and you'll be well on your way to social butterfly in no time!

1. If you see two or more people engaged in conversation, do not ... I repeat, do not ... interrupt; it's fucking rude! If you do feel the uncontrollable urge to be an asshole, at least do not exclude any of the current party from the now forced-upon conversation. Doing so puts you in douchebag company, a label hard to shake.
   
2. If someone is sitting, standing, and so forth by themselves it is not because they are lonely; if they were lonely, they would talk to you. No, the reason they are apart from everyone else is because, surprise, they want to be left alone. Please grant them their wish. They will thank you for it.
   
3. The easiest way to see if someone wishes to talk to you would be to offer them a drink. If they refuse the offer, you have your answer.
   
4. Make a space for folks to walk by. If you want to dance, use the goddamn dance floor. That's why they spent so much money building one, dick.
   
5. No one wants to see you make out all night. Go the fuck home already.
   
6. A nightclub is no place to pout all night. You aren't going to get a sympathy fuck from anyone ... or more to the point, you wouldn't want a sympathy fuck from anyone in a nightclub who would offer you one.

There you have it. Go and be sociable.

You (Insomnia And A Busy Mind. (Have To Love It. (Three Separate Thoughts.)))

I love you. I don't know where the road, if there is one, leads with you. I know what direction I would like for it to take but I have no control over you or the cosmic forces of the universe. And thus I am stunned into stillness. What am I to do? I don't know either.

I love you too. I've loved you deeper than I've loved any one else to date. Yet, for all I've done and I've tried to show, you've painted me into this corner. I allowed you to do so. There's no going back; the past is the past. And here I am. Loving you. And hating you. And hating myself for feeling both for you. In the end, I want you to be happy. With that, I hope to be content, as far as you and I stand.

And finally you. You seem to always be of divided minds. I don't know how to help you find your way. We've worked on this for you for a very long time. You seem to keep your ground. But I know you'll find your happiness one day. For your sake, I hope it's sooner rather than later. You'll forgive me, though, if I don't hold my breath.

You ... you who are reading this and who may be thinking that this post is about you ... you are held very dear to me and close to my heart, for better or worse. You are a big part of who I am today; for that you will keep that special place in my heart. Even if we never speak again, I will always thank you for the gift you've given me. I hope that we can find the appropriate places that we should maintain in our respective lives. If we don't, I know that the loss will be mine.

I'm tired. Of fighting. Of obsessing. Of running this track, lap after lap. I've decided to let it all go. Everything will fall where it is meant to fall. I will then assess what is what and where is where and continue on.

Why Am I Such A Mess Lately?

And by lately, I mean within the past few months. And by mess, I mean this ball of confusion. I am welcome to comments; have at ye. That is all.

Fields Of Grey

I shouldn't blog when tired. I also shouldn't kick babies, trip blind people, or heckle preachers; but what'cha gonna do? I find that, living alone as I do now and having a job that allows me flexible work hours, I have more time to myself then I know what to do with. So I think. A lot.

Me and thinking should never be alone in the same room together. More often than not, my attention turns to sleeping dogs that I should just let lie.

But that isn't how I am. I stress over things I can't change and I contemplate how I could make better those things that I can change. And I get them all confused. Then I get frustrated and down. And the lack of sleep only compounds the mess. (Stupid insomnia.)

So here I am. Stressed and down. And bugging out over this grey mess in my mind ... or this grey mess that is my mind.

So ... yes.

Patience

I have patience in spades.

Patience, as defined by Dictionary.com, means, among other things, "quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care". Patience, when supported by wisdom and decisiveness, is a powerful tool to possess. It allows one to bide time, view all options, weigh all facts, and come to a reasoned and researched and (hopefully) positive result.

But when patience stands alone, it is nothing more than glorified procrastination. Stupidity and uncertainty abound. Opportunities slide out of hand. Situations that should have ended continue on their poisonous path.

I am often accused of being indecisive, of taking too long to follow a course of action. In reflection, I have found that this is more often true than not. While I always strive to practice the first type of patience, I do not always hit that mark. I wait too long. I weigh my options until all options are gone. And in the end I am either left holding an empty bag or a bag of shit.

I have been working to alter this flaw in myself. It is quite difficult, as it has become second nature to me. But I have begun to set agendas and follow through. My next lesson is to discover what is actionable by me and what is up to others to perform ... and to push for a conclusion from them so that I can contemplate and make my next move.

I make life sound like chess.

I suppose in some ways it is. I make a move then wait for you to make your move so that I can reassess the situation and make another move. Except rarely in life are there ever checkmates. We play to a stalemate, reset the board, and start a new game. (But this is a topic for another post ... preferably on someone else's blog. I'm not so good with this cerebral philosophical stuff.)

What's my point in all of this? I don't rightly know. Perhaps my loyal readers can help me out in the comments section.

For Those Who Know My Children ...

Random Randomness

1. My boys need new nicknames. I'll be putting thought to that.
2. Drunk people are funny. Except for when they're not. Then they're just tragic. And that's a fine line, kids.
3. People still do not know how to behave in elevators. Allow me to refresh your memory on what appropriate behavior is.
4. My favorite springtime poem since childhood, author unknown:

The spring has sprung, the grass has ris'. I wonder where de boidies is? Dey say de boid is on de wing, but dat's absoid. De wing is on de boid!

5. Battlestar Galactica is the best science fiction television series ever. And if you disagree, you're wrong. And a freedom-hating Communazislamofascist. And make the baby Jesus cry. Shame on you.
6. A man who has stopped making friends is a man who has stopped living.
7. I'm addicted to this show. Don't judge me too harshly. (There's no trend here. Really. Because ...)
8. I'm also addicted to this show and this show.
9. I still want one of these.
10. My seats rock! Yes, you may be jealous. And I have an extra seat for Thursday 01 May 2008 19:00 and Thursday 05 June 2008 19:00. Please form a single line, and I do take bribes.

Another Sleepless Night (Thank You "Mutual Friend")

I can't sleep. I wanted to sleep ... six hours ago. But I went out to hang with mutual friend. In all honesty, I had a great time. And after eight hours of reading technical documents in my living room, I really needed to get out of the house for a bit.

So I thank you, mutual friend. I truly do.

Still, sleep would have been nice.

Lately when I'm out, I find that I don't really want to be out. I go out to see friendly faces ... and faces of friends. I enjoy their company, especially the friends. They are a good comfort (and I hope "they" know who they are).

But there's something missing now. Which is why I can't sleep right now.

Don't misunderstand. I'm not the mess I've been in the past. At least not tonight. I'm very sober and very cognizant of what's happening.

I just know there's something missing. And I need to come to some sort of terms with that.

The Day Two Years In The Making

So here it was, the first professional baseball game ever played in the just-finished Nationals Park, and I am glad to report that the place is beautiful. There is still some work to do, such as installing televisions where "Future Site of Television" signs currently hang and working out those concessions issues, but all-in-all the ballpark is a success.

You can see the pictures, but they really don't do the place justice. It truly is a diamond in the crown of Washington DC (pun intended), and those involved in making it happen - the politicians who approved it, the business owners who are being taxed for it, the planners who designed it, the construction workers who built it - should feel very proud of their achievement.

Star Wars Stuff We (Sort Of) Wish We Had

NPR has a short article about Star Wars merchandise that never saw the light of day. You will find the audio slide show right here.

It's a shame, honestly. I mean, who wouldn't want Princess Leia AM/FM stereo headphones?

UPDATE: You can find the whole rejected bunch at the bottom of this Ottertorials post. Each picture is clickable so that you can get a good up-close look, much like the picture featured on this post.

(God, I want a Jedi Mood Ring ...)

To The Brim

I generally have control of my emotions and everything that goes with them, but right now ... at this moment ... with everything with which I am dealing ... I'm having a difficult time. I have moments when I just can't contain them, when they have to run loose. And right now, when I can't sleep, is one of them.

My Horoscope For Today

I read horoscopes on occassion but I don't bet any money on them. They're usually generic tripe that has nothing to do with my life. But today's is actually quite apropos:

You may be buzzing on all the energy you feel, but a deeper flow of emotions can catch you off guard, possibly even sending you into a temporary tailspin. Don't worry; you'll quickly recover as long as you acknowledge the progress you have made. Looking within doesn't necessarily require looking back. Imagine your future rather than dreaming of your past.

The Countdown Begins

Five more days and I'm free of this place. This place that I've spent the last thirty months working my butt off to make some semblance of order out of the chaos that existed before my arrival. In my time here I helped write the handbook, single-handedly wrote the operations guide, helped flesh out and documented the procedures that we use to do our day-to-day jobs here, and trained a countless people within and without my team on how to do this job. Oh, and actualy do the job at the same time.

It's been thankless and it's been stressful and it's been miserable.

But in five more days. Freedom. Sweet freedom.

The Past Week - New York City

New York City - The Big Apple - The City That Never Sleeps. If you've never been, shame on you. Everyone should go at least once in their life. I enjoy the place. But then, I'm a city mouse.

So, we went up to NYC, where my *former* roommate had worked out lodging for the evening. Now, I've been to NYC a few times. Once I stayed at a friend's small one-bedroom with my ex and two friends of ours. Once I stayed in a tiny hotel room a block from Times Square. Once I stayed at my ex's friend's sister's flat in the Fashion District. Of all the places I stayed, that last place was the one that made me pause and think "Holy shit, this is nice!"

I had no idea what I was talking about.

But we'll get to that in a few.

After the show we met Mr. NYC, his husband, and a friend of theirs at a restaurant a couple blocks down the street. The food was good, as was the wine. After dinner, we followed him back to his place. We unloaded our overnight bags and Mr. NYC asked if we wanted to go out. (Any city that you can go out to a jumping bar that is open until 4 AM on a Monday is my kind of town.) Of course we said yes. He offered to drive and we didn't object. Let's face it, how could anyone object to having the opportunity to ride in one of these, even if only for a few minutes? We all get in and he decides to show us what his ride could do.

Let me tell you what it could do ... it could do 128 MPH in Midtown Manhattan ... that's what it could do.

Now this was all good and fine except police apparently discourage driving at such high speeds in the city. Yes, we were busted by the fuzz. Who had us sit on the rear bumper of the ride while they searched the car. (To make sure we didn't have any illegal substances. Which we did not.) They give Mr. NYC a warning (a warning after getting caught doing 90 MPH) and allow us to leave. And we do. We get to a bar in Chelsea just as the drag show was finishing, fortunately. We get a round of drinks and, just as we sit in the lounge area, we were joined by some college kids who were visiting from Indiana. Good kids, all in all. We hang out until closing (at 4 AM. Did I mention that already?) and head back to the condo ... Mr. NYC, me, my *former* roommate, and our mutual friend ... and the college kids. I went immediately to bed because I was friggin' exhausted. They all stayed up until who knows when.

We woke up late on Tuesday (sans college kids, who had left at some point during the wee hours of the morning, and Mr. NYC, who had gone to work), went walking around NYC for a few hours, then headed home. Nothing terribly exciting, because we didn't really plan for it. Next time will be better.

Now about that condo -- total swank. What do I mean exactly? In this photo set, you can see pictures of the view from his condominium (the first five) and pictures of the first floor of his condominium (the next ten).

I try very hard to remain unimpressed by titles and money and things. In the end, people are people and stuff is stuff. But I have to admit that I was overwhelmed by it all. I felt so small, so insignificant. I don't ever want to have that kind of money, but I'd like to have maybe half of that kind of money. Staying there really brought home the fact that I'm so, so far away from that.

Mr. NYC was much more down-to-earth and far more gracious than his surroundings would have one believe. I'm glad I got to experience that, especially with my boys, but I don't think I would want to go through that again. Unless the person was actually a friend of mine. Then it's game on.

The Past Week - Mario Spinetti

Last Monday my *former* roommate, a mutual friend of ours, and I drove up to New York City to see a live performance by our favorite new up-and-coming artist.

The original plan was to go up, spend a few hours in the city, see the show, then drive back home. My *former* roommate managed somehow to befriend a New Yorker while he was working the Friday night before our adventure and secure a place for us to sleep that Monday night after the show. (You work it, boy!) (And more on that in a separate post a bit later today.)

So, yes, we make the drive up to NYC last Monday morning (in about 3.5 hours - go me!) and spend a few hours walking around the city. Hilarity and hijinx ensue, because we crack ourselves up. That happens when three people who share the same mind are together.

We get to Drom a bit too early. (Hey, we were expecting a crowd. And Mario said to show up early. And Mario wouldn't lie to us.) We walk in just as they began setting up for the show. At the "box office" (read: a dinner table) was who we think was Mario's manager (or he could have been the Drom manager) and ... is that? ... yes, Mario himself. We said hello and wished him luck but didn't hold a conversation. As someone who's performed in front of an audience, trust me, before a show is not the time to talk to a performer. So we grab our seats at a table front-and-center and settled in for the show.

I'm not going to go into detail about everything. I'll just say the following:

• Amature photographers at the foot of the stage snapping pictures left and right is never a good idea. Rethink the promo shots in future shows.
• The new music worked very well with the already-recorded music. The whole bunch would make a solid first LP.
• The live performances of the already-recorded music was spot on. It really did justice to the music we came to know and love.
• His band was most excellent. The live introduction to "I Was There", with the lead guitarist and the keyboardist, was incredibly moving.
• Despite the fact that my *former* roommate had to almost tackle him, once he did sit and talk with us after the show, Mario was warm and engaging. He asked for our opinions and seemed to take them to heart.
• Mario is a major hottie.

The show itself was worth the trip to NYC. We'll probably continue to make the occassional trek back up there to see future performances ... that is until he starts booking shows down here.

You can see pictures of the show here.

The Past Week - Books And Strings And Things

So, last week the PowerBook crapped out. I had to have the hard drive and the SDRAM replaced. Fortunately, the total cost (parts, labor, and shipping) was under $350. Not bad. It's still a little flakey so I'll have to take it back in to have them check the OS. (I think it may not be installed properly.)

I've been job hunting for over a year. It has only been in the past month, knowing that I would become unemployed at the end of the month, that my contacts have been working hard to help me find something. I'm sure they were working hard before (*cough cough*). After many stressful days, I can proudly say that I will have continuing employment. I've accepted a position that will challenge me and continue my growth in the IT security field. Celebrating will start tonight and continue to the end of the month. (Woo-hoo!)

Monday and Tuesday, I was in New York City with my roommate and a friend of ours. We went up to see a singer/songwriter who is pretty much just starting out in a show up there. There is much to say about that trip, which will be done in a separate post.

I also have some personal shtuff to vent. That will also be done in yet another separate post.

For now, rejoice in the return of the newly improved PowerBook and the landing of a new job.

Wish Me Luck

I haven't forgotten about telling you of this past weekend. I spent last night rebuilding my laptop and preparing for what I hope to be my final interview (where I currently am, waiting for everyone to arrive). I'll fill you in ... generically ... on this too. But for now, wish me luck.

Place-Holder Post

My-oh-my, I have a few things to discuss. There's the PowerBook, the job hunt, the weekend, and getting busted in a prostitution ring scandal ... no, wait, that wasn't me.

In any case, posts explaining everything will be done tonight. Right now, I'm up to Shaq's nipples in work.

Early Morning Smile

I love Tim Gunn. I was also once the object of romantic attention of Christian in a Baltimore bar one night last year (when he was still an undiscovered and underaged local talent) and enjoyed his company. Seeing this clip brought a much-needed smile to my face this morning. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did.

Talk Of The Town

I like attention. I like having all eyes on me. I like being the topic of conversation. Except when it's for reasons other than my rugged good looks, my smarmy charm, and my disarming humor.

Let me just put this out there for whomever it may concern:

I am glad to discuss things of utmost importance. I will talk about the demons between us that should be exorcised. (Because, let's face it, who wants fat demons?) I will be happy to kick about the various ways we can end world hunger, join all religions in the ultimate Kumbaya, and be the salve for the pains of all people. I would even consider opining at length about the state of politics, finance, and health care in the world today. We can hold these debates at any coffee shop or restaurant of our choosing.

But I will never again have a serious conversation within the confines of a House of Music. I am there to enjoy a drink (or four), forget my daily stresses, and *perhaps* dance a bit. If approached on a serious topic, I will simply walk away.

I hope we are all clear on this.

Ten Thoughts to Ponder

1. Life is sexually transmitted.
2. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
3. Men have two emotions, hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
4. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
5. Some people are like a Slinky - not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
6. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
7. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
8. Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut saves you $30?
9. In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
10. We know exactly where one cow with Mad Cow Disease is located among millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Immigration?

Bonus Thought:
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers - what you do today might burn your ass tomorrow.

Study Shows That ... Zzz ...

I would share my thoughts about this story but I'm just too tired right now.

UPDATE:
If only I had done this ...

Them's My Boys!

In today's Weekend section of The Washington Post, NightLife covers late-night eats around the city. And, lo and behold, there featured in the third picture in the slideshow are my boys Mark and Charlie! To quote Charlie, "How glam and tragic at the same time."

True that, my friend. True that.

Royals At War

Okay. First, WOOF! Second, good for him. Third, shame on the media for reporting the story.

I do understand the need to know, but this really isn't something that is a need to know. Perhaps the fact the he was serving overseas was something of which people should be aware, but what and where exactly should have been handled as TOP SECRET information. Whoever leaked this should be prosecuted.

Or maybe that's just me.

Thank You, Daddy! May I Have Another?

I'm sorry but I don't buy the results of this analysis. I would venture to guess that the majority of my generation was subjected to some form of corporal punishment in our childhood. (What is the plural of childhood? Childhood? Childhoods? Childrenhood?) But I doubt that the majority of that majority turned out to be kinky sex fiends. Hell, the fastest way to turn me off is to get rough with me. (Not that you needed to know that.)

All I Wanted Was A Cup O' Joe

How difficult is it to make coffee? For some people, it's difficult enough that it requires three hours of additional training.

*sigh*

Here, I'll make it simple for you.

Coffee Instructions:

1 12-cup filter drip coffee maker.
1 coffee filter.
12 cups of cold water.
4 tablespoons of ground coffee beans, not instant.


1. Open lid.
2. Place coffee filter into coffee maker filter basket.
3. Pour ground coffee into coffee filter.
4. Pour water into coffee maker water reservoir.
5. Close lid.
6. Make sure that pitcher is placed securely underneath the drip.
7. Turn on coffee maker.
8. When coffee has finished dripping into pitcher, serve hot in coffee mug. Add sweetener and creamer to taste.
   
   Total time = 10 minutes.

There. Now you know more than some people.

Things Will Be Better When ...

How did you finish that sentence?

Write it down and take a good, long look at it. Think about it. Meditate on it. Take your time with it.

Do you honestly believe what you wrote?

You do?

Really?

I want you to take another moment now. Think about the last time you thought "things will be better when ...".

Did things get better?

They did?

Well ...

... if they did ...

... why is it that you're still looking toward "when"?

A Long Week

And where have you been, Mr. Man? HMM?!

Yes, I've been a bit MIA the past week. There had been a lot on my plate, mentally and emotionally, which left no room for creative writing. But we're back now ... mostly ... and I'll have a few semi-important things to say in the coming days.

And if you're good boys and girls, I might have something later today for you. If not, it's off to bed without dessert for you.

Like, Total Randomness, Y'know?

1. I am treated far too kindly by people who barely know me.
2. I love my ex and am saddened that we find ourselves where we are today.
3. There is too much unsettlement in my life at the moment.
4. Waiting for other things to happen so I can proceed sucks (and not in a good way).
5. Mario Spinetti rocks my socks. (Hey, Mario, where's the full-length album already?)
6. I still hate exercising. Cardio sucks. (But waiting still sucks more.)
7. Jim Zorn? Okay, if you say so. We'll see how that works out. At least I have something to be excited about right now.
8. I'm already hoping that Obama wins the White House so that, after his first veto, I can start using my newly coined term ... Barak-ade©! (As in, the latest bill passed by Congress was Barak-aded© by the White House.)

I'm Shocked. Are You Shocked?

"Remember all that stuff I said on Wednesday? Well, it wasn't exactly what I meant. What I meant was ..."

The Populist Mayor Comes Around

I would love to know what prompted this shift in position at the mayor's office. Don't get me wrong, I have been a supporter of this idea from the beginning and have always thought that it would be good for the city, for D.C. United, and for the residents of Ward 8. But Mayor Fenty had been so adamantly against using public funding for private stadiums ... well, it just makes me wonder.

Happy St. Valentine's Day

Image taken from here

The Potomac Primary

Hopefully all of you Republicans and Democrats are out there pulling levers, pushing buttons, and marking exes in blood on your ballots. Those of us who are not affiliated to either party are, unfortunately, left to watch the election process at this point.

(No, I will not register for any party that does not share the bulk of my ideals just so I can whittle a number of candidates down to one. I'll wait until the general election, thank you very much.)

I only ask one favor of you who do get to vote ... please don't screw this up for the rest of us.

Happy voting!

Why I Hate why.i.hate.dc

Once upon a time, I happened across a blog site. This blog site was written by a fellow tagged "James F." and he dedicated his corner of the web to being critical of the District. What made his blog readable was his sense of humor, his wry observations, and his wit. More often than not his tirades pissed me off (because I happen to love D.C.) yet I could not help but chuckle at his posts.

"James F." has since moved on to other places (Seattle, to be specific) and, after an extensive auditioning period, he passed his mantle on to a new blogger. This new blogger, "Rusty", would maintain the venom, wit, and humor that readers had come to expect from the blog site, "James F." reassured his readers.

"Rusty" is the anti-"James F.", as it turns out. He has no sense of humor. His posts lack wit. Most of the time, "Rusty" displays the cynicism that often creeps into District transplants after a few years.

why.i.hate.dc has become quite painful to read. It seems that "Rusty" posts just to have something to complain about, without applying any time to find the humor in things that "James F." showed. A good example would be the most recent post about the Washington Post employees who are currently running a campaign against the paper to shame it into acting fairly in regards to wages, raises, and pensions. "Rusty" is upset about how the Farragut North Metro Station is plastered with WashingtonPostUnfair.com advertisements. That's it. No snarky comments. No sharp retorts. Just wholesale bitching. A missed opportunity, if you ask me (which you didn't).

How is that remotely entertaining?

Most of the comments on the site since "Rusty" took over have been about how the site has gone downhill and how "Rusty" should just shut up. Personally, I think "Rusty" should keep blogging. Cry-baby whining aside, he does point out some things that should be pointed out.

But I also think he should spend a day watching this man to see how complaining should be done.

Rainy Day Metro (Or, My Underwater Adventure)

I take Metrobus to and from work every day. When probable, I take Metrobus to get into the city proper. I do this for three different reasons:

1. It saves gas and wear-and-tear on my car.
2. The Metrorail station is too far to walk.
3. A Metrobus stop is right in front of my building.

I generally don't have any complaints about the bus. It's been fairly reliable (although a bit erratic during non-rush hours) and, in my experience, been fairly clean and safe.

But the ride home from work today was different. My bus was ... how shall we say ... not up to snuff. I understand that Metrobus funding, even more so than Metrorail funding, leaves much to be desired. I understand that some buses in the Metrobus fleet are a bit long in the tooth. But when, on a rainy day such as today, the bus is leakier than the Bush Administration ... well, I think it's time to retire that bus.

I submit to you the following for evidence:

PEOPLE'S EXHIBIT A

Notice how the metal bar is rusted and pulling from the roof. This, my friends, is the breach in the bus. This is the origin of the waterfall. This is dangerous.

PEOPLE'S EXHIBIT B

See that white streak along the left side of the blue roof (near the hand hold)? Water!

I know what you're thinking. So what? So water's dripping from the ceiling. At points it was just dripping. At other points it was ... um ... more than dripping. Which leads us to ...

PEOPLE'S EXHIBIT C

These seats were across-ish from me. Both seats, if you look closely, have pools of water in them. I counted about 11 seats on the bus with such pools of water, making them unusable. This bus had 1/3 of the seats unusable on a busy bus during rush hour. Unacceptable!

And just so that you can see more clearly for yourselves, here, my final exhibit, is a closer look at one of these seats.

PEOPLE'S EXHIBIT D

This was one of the smaller pools. You would seriously need a squeegee and a beach towel to dry these seats off enough to make them useable for passengers.

Seriously, Metro, let's do something about this, huh? I know Metrorail gets most of the love, but you've got a large ridership on Metrobus too. How's about you not forget about us people either?

Latest AIDS News

File this latest news from Switzerland under WTF?!:

The Swiss National AIDS Commission said patients who meet strict conditions, including successful antiretroviral treatment to suppress the virus and who do not have any other sexually transmitted diseases, do not pose a danger to others.

Charlie Gilks, director of AIDS treatment and prevention at the World Health Organization, thinks this might be a tad bit irresponsible:

He said WHO was concerned that the Swiss proposal could be misinterpreted to imply that everybody who is on treatment can have unprotected sex.

"It may be fine for Switzerland, it may be fine for a few other countries who have similar small numbers of patients who are very carefully followed up," said Gilks. "But from our point of view globally, we are not going to be changing our recommendations."

But I tend to agree with the following:

"Not only is (the Swiss proposal) dangerous, it's misleading and it is not considering the implications of the biological facts involved with HIV transmission," said Jay Levy, director of the Laboratory for Tumor and AIDS Virus Research at the University of California in San Francisco.

In other words, don't be a dumbass! Either practice abstinence or, if you are going to have sex, use a condom each time every time.

Say A Little Prayer

I don't know in what god you believe. I don't know in what you place your faith. I don't know to whom you pray.

Whatever your spiritual calling (or non-calling) happens to be, my household could really use whatever positive energy you can send this way.

Thank you in advance.

The End Of A Disturbing Ad Campaign

Kudos to Wendy's for ending its appetite-killing, red-pigtailed commercials. Of all of the fast food restaurants out there, Wendy's is my strong Number Two after Chipotle ...

(... mmm ... Burrito Bowl ...)

*wipes drool from chin*

... but their commercials almost turned me away.

Almost.

I'm glad to see that they're righting an egregious wrong and focusing on their delicious food instead of some stomach-turning gimmick.

Now, if only a certain other company would rethink its commercials, all might be well on D.C. airwaves.

A Little Reminder

Here is yet another reason why I *heart* Sinfest:

Brain ... Melting ... Urge To Kill ... Rising ...

So, in the last twenty minutes, I was subjected to four ... count them - FOUR ... Koons Toyota commercials. (Two sets of two. BACK TO BACK. I know you feel my pain.) Now it was bad enough that I had to endure Krystal Koons' raspy, inflection-free voice on WTOP every five minutes during my rush hour drives to Chantilly and back. But to have to see her emotionless, android-like, CGI face FOUR TIMES IN TWENTY MINUTES is more punishment than a death row inmate (or Lindsay Lohan) should have to bear.

Major local television stations, please ... PLEASE ... stop this madness. It's bad enough that The CW runs those horrid "Law Offices of Peter G. Angelos, PC" commercials. (Peter Angelos. Oh the gall.) They can be forgiven because ... well, because they're The CW and they need whatever revenue flow they can find. But FOX5? Shame on you.

Cloverfield - The Spoiler-Free-ish Review

Okay. I witnessed the event of the year last night. (Hey! It's only January! Settle down over there!) How was it, you might be wondering.

Let me start by stating that I was early. Very early. Disturbing geeky fanboy early. First one in line early. I didn't plan or want to be; it just happened that events worked it that way for me. After waiting for *mumble* hours, I finally grabbed my seat.

I hate commercials at the theater. Can I just tell you that? I can understand sitting through them for free television. (You know, the kind you get with your rabbit ears? The kind that won't work after this goes into effect?) But I'm paying a pretty penny to sit and watch movies in a movie theater. Ixnay ethay ommercialscay. I figured we're close enough for me to share that. Thanks.

But to the movie.

Oh, another thing. I am seriously unnerved by people who actually try to be first in line at things like this. These are the same people who will spend hours debating the damage points of a Dark Mage who possesses the mystica ... whatever. It's just a movie and you will get a seat. Calm the fuck down, dork.

Huh? Oh. Right. The movie.

By the way. I may have been early enough to be first in line. But I wasn't first in line. Or second. Or third. I was seventh. So suck it.

Anyway. The damn commercials are over and the trailers begin. Generally, I enjoy trailers. Sure some ... okay, most ... of them are crap and some of them over-sell their movie. It's an art, making trailers. The prime example is the trailer for Cloverfield - the first one, shown before Transformers. It is the only trailer I've ever seen where my only reaction was "What the fuck was THAT?!" That's how all trailers should be. The trailers we saw tonight? If you watched I Am Legend in the theater, you've seen these trailers already.

What was I talking about? Movie. Right.

Ooo ... except for one trailer. A teaser for the new Star Trek movie was shown. Thirty seconds of the USS Enterprise under construction. Which is what the text on the screen said - "UNDER CONSTRUCTION". Like the movie still is. Witty, that J.J. Abrams.

I still haven't told you anything about the movie, have I? Hmm, let's see what I can say without really saying anything.

I didn't view it as "America's Godzilla", as Mr. Abrams had envisioned. This movie didn't have the underlying social commentary that Godzilla had. (And if it did, I completely missed it. I certainly didn't get the connection to 9/11 that some people had been suggesting.) The monster was also very cat-and-mouse, as the director said in interviews it would be. The big reveal didn't come until almost the end of the movie, and even that left viewers wanting more. (A cheap trick to ensure a sequel, perhaps?)

Also, if Blair Witch Project made you motion sick or gave you a headache, you should take something before seeing this movie. The camerawork didn't bother me too much.

Did I like it? Eh ... I wasn't blown away by the movie, but I'd see it again. There were some things in it that I really wish had been different. I believe that the film makers could have impressed the same sense of intimacy and confusion on the movie watchers without using the "handheld recorder" device. To me, it made the movie seem very amateur and a little hard to follow. Additionally, I was so annoyed by some characters that I wished they died much earlier and in extremely painful ways. But they didn't. (I suppose that's true in real life, too.)

I would also like to add that if you're billing this as a "giant monster beats down New York City like Ike Turner beat down Tina" movie, then I expect to see more destruction as it's happening, not the aftermath of the destruction. While character investment is a good thing in most movies, no one really gives a flip about the characters in a monster movie. Characters in movies like this are expendable, like EMI employees (ZING!); it's all about the monster and what destruction said monster inflicts on humanity.

There were a lot of very cool and extremely tense moments, enough to justify a second viewing by me. The monster (Mr. Grumpy Pants, or MGP, as some sites call it) is pretty wicked. Some of the scenes made me gasp. Out loud. And I was rather satisfied with the ending.

It isn't everything the hype has made it out to be, but I do recommend that you see it. (Preferrably on the Big Screen.) Then come back here and share your thoughts in the comments section.

HGTV Change The World Communities - The Results

HGTV has announced the winners of its Change The World contest. Thanks to all who voted ... Anacostia made the list!

You now have the opportunity to volunteer at the efforts chosen for Anacostia. More information on those efforts can be found here.

Elevator Etiquette

Elevators are a necessary evil. We all have to use them at some point and none of us are terribly excited about sharing such close quarters with complete strangers. That said, please show some respect to your fellow riders by showing the following courtesies.

1. Do not fart on the elevator. Ever.
2. Hold the door for those coming in behind you. Immediately walking to the back and looking at the floor does not abdicate you of this. You aren't the only one who has to use this thing, you selfish prick.
3. Unless you have some physical disability or limitation, do not take the elevator for trips of fewer than two floors. It pisses people off. Really.
4. Save those disturbing personal conversations for other small enclosed areas ... like your office.
5. Your cell phone won't work in the elevator. Put it away.

Your friends, coworkers, and other assorted persons thank you in advance.

A Quick Vent

I might have made different decisions if I knew then what I know now. I might not have tethered myself so solidly to this rock. I might have left myself a little breathing room. I might have given myself options.

But I didn't know and I made the best decisions I could for the way things were. Things seemed so eternal then. Life seemed set then. Choices seemed like such a given then. Going "all in" seemed like a smart move then.

I do not regret the choices made. I am not sad about the way things are now, although I do still cry sometimes. I do not wish that things had turned out other than they are; life happens the way it is supposed to happen despite our best efforts to will it differently.

Hmm.

Actually, I would probably make the same decisions if I were given a do-over.

But sometimes the noose feels so tight and I start to second-guess myself again.

What Ever Happened To ... ?

Mmm ... Foamy Flakes.

iRuh-Oh!

For a company that promotes its products as more secure than certain other products, this certainly doesn't bode well. It seems as though a crack has appeared in the dam. It will only be a matter of time before a flood ensues.

Get ahead of the curve here, Great And Powerful One, lest you become as He Who Shall Not Be Named.

A Question Posed

It was a simple, common question. We have all asked it at some point or another in our lives. Answered positively, it can fuel a disappointment or feed an ego. Answered to the negative, it can face regret or relief. Thus is the wily nature of the question.

In giving an answer to the question, I would be transferring the burden from one to many. We have so much care in our lives as it is; there is no need to add to the load. And when it comes to certain aspects of my life, I would rather prevent the boat from rocking. It is a flaw of mine. I know that is not necessarily a valid reason. I know it is a crappy copout of an excuse. For better or worse, however, it is my gut reaction and the course I have taken.

Though I suppose that if the question were formed differently or if I were pressed to answer, I would yield.

But if we were being completely honest with ourselves, the question would not have been asked in the first place ... because you already know the answer.

Happy Election Year

With the Primary season having begun last week, I am serving a friendly reminder for all District residents to vote this year. It is true that D.C. votes count about as much as legal advice for Britney Spears, but it is your civic duty and there are a great many people in this world who do not have such luxuries.

New Year, New Look

Happy New Year 2008, everyone.

The turn of a new year (and hopefully a turn of fortunes) has prompted me to change the ol' blog site a little. Nothing fancy, just a fresh coat of paint and some minor rearranging. I've been playing with the layout for a few days now and I think it's just about right. What do you think?