It's Halloween, People!

I saw a news segment on CNN on Saturday that made my brain hurt. It seems that there are some people out there who are none too happy with a certain Halloween costume.

Immigrant rights activists are calling on U.S. retailers to stop selling two controversial "Illegal Alien" costumes that have surfaced for Halloween, saying the outfits are a broadside attack on illegal immigrants.

The "Illegal Alien Adult Costume," manufactured by Forum novelties, includes an orange jumpsuit, similar to prison garb, with "Illegal Alien" stamped in black across the chest; a space alien mask; and a fake Green Card. The "Illegal Alien Mask with Hat" also includes a space alien mask, this time with a dark handlebar mustache and a baseball cap.

Now, I happen to slightly agree with their position on the mask with the mustache. That one is pretty blatant and I can understand the outrage. But an alien in a jumpsuit and a fake green card? Come on, people! Lighten up! That's funny stuff! Have people forgotten about a certain movie and its sequel that deal with aliens that illegally reside here? That was the first thing I thought of when I saw that costume. That the first place some people go is instantly insulted is simply sad.

This outrage has caused some of our retailers to pull the costume from their stores. And I think that's a shame. So I'm supplying you with links on where you can purchase your very own illegal alien Halloween costume.

And, because this has stuck in my craw so deeply, I'm giving you an added bonus today ... a music video!

Bad Blogger! Bad, Bad Blogger!

Yes, I know. I've let this site sit stagnant and cobwebby for roughly a month. I wish I had a good excuse, but I don't ... I've been a victim of the daily grind of life. In my absence, I have missed posting about a great many happenings in the world, a couple of which I want to comment on quickly.

First is the recent death of wrestling icon and music video regular Captain Lou Albano. World Wrestling Federation (WWF) (later to become World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) due to a lawsuit from the World Wildlife Fund) was just coming into its own in the late 70's to mid 80's. They were on TV every weekend. They were appearing in music videos. Why, the wrestling stars of that day even had their own Saturday morning cartoon. And Captain Lou was right in the middle of it all. It's trendy to mock or even criticize wrestling today for its over-the-top antics and its violence. But while the current level of "realism" didn't exist back then, the over-the-top antics and personalities most certainly did. And back then, it was good clean fun. Captain Lou, along with all of the other wrestling stars of those days, will always be a part of me because he was a fairly big part of my childhood.

The other thing I'd like to comment on, and would have done on Random Music Tuesday if I had had the time, is the 30th anniversary of the Fleetwood Mac album Tusk. The album had been compared to The Beatles (a.k.a., The White Album) due to the experimentation of the band and that it was a double album. I suppose it's up to us, the listeners, to decide if it is a good album or not but one cannot deny the power of the title track. How many other Top 10 hits can you name that makes use of a college marching band?

And with that, I would be remiss if I didn't give you something from the album to listen to. So, without further ado, here is "Tusk".

Fleetwood Mac - Tusk
by jpdc11

Home Movies

This is by far one of my most favorite commercials of all time. Wouldn't you agree, Tuffie?

Random Music Tuesday: "She Wolf" by Shakira

Releasing her third English album and her sixth album overall, Shakira has completely transformed herself from a gritty girl rocker to a sultry dance-pop sex kitten. To quote the artist, this song is about "a more animalistic side of you, a more primitive side … an animal person in a way, So when you understand these things you forgive yourself every time you screw up, you say, It wasn’t me, that was the she wolf … that was the animal in me, that wasn’t me, I have nothing to do with that".

Um, okay.

So it doesn't really matter what the song is about. What matters is the music. And the music is quite catchy. If you haven't heard it, here it is. Take a quick listen.

Shakira - New Music - More Music Videos

My only beef with the song, and the one part that cracks me up inside, is that pathetic excuse for a howl in the chorus. Really, Shakira? You're a friggin' she wolf. Let it out! Let it out! Let it out! If you don't know how to, take the following ... the textbook, the master, the one any future howlists should try to emulate.


Warren Zevon - Werewolves of London

R.I.P., Patrick Swayze

Patrick Swayze died tonight of pancreatic cancer.

I may get some ribbing for this, but I liked Patrick Swayze. He was one of those actors who showed equal parts strength and vulnerability. I think he was one of the more underrated actors because he happened to get typecast after "Dirty Dancing" and "Ghost". But just read the reviews of Swayze's performance in "The Beast" and you'll see that he wasn't just a romantic lead. In fact, he never took himself too seriously. Which leads me to one of my most favorite Patrick Swayze moments ... one that involved a certain TV show, a certain physical comedy actor, and a certain night club.

Patrick Swayze - Chippendale

Vaya con Dios, Mr. Swayze.

Dear Washington Capitals

Thank you for my 2009-2010 Season Tickets. They came in on Thursday and I am ecstatic to have them! I remember when my 2008-2009 Season Tickets came in. They arrived via UPS in one of their plastic envelopes; inside were the tickets, a letter from you thanking me for being a fan, and a wonderfully useful shoulder bag (perfect for a sleep-over or a jaunt through the city.

This year's tickets, as you know, came in a large UPS box. The box had a good deal of heft on it. Then I opened the box and found within it another box. And it pretty box it was too!


I was so excited to receive this box! Whatever could be inside? A keepsake ornament? A metal box in which to keep this year's tickets? A t-shirt? I opened the box and found ... a piece of filler paper and this ...


No keepsake ornament. No metal box in which to keep this year's tickets. No t-shirt. Just the filler paper, the letter, the guide, and the tickets.

Now, I'm not the most environmentally conscious person on the planet, but even I can see what a waste this packaging was. Why did you send such small items in such a large box? That doesn't make any sense, especially not from an organization that has lately been priding itself with its lack of waste.

Why, Washington Capitals? Why?!

If you read this (and I know you don't) and if you'll take my advice (which I know you won't), PLEASE do not do this again in the future. For one, it's extremely wasteful. For two, after raising the expectations of the season ticket buyer who has received the package, it's a big disappointment to your fans.

Thanks,
The Diarist

This Infamous Day

Today is the eleventh of September. You probably already knew that, unless of course you live life without calendars or are so far removed from civilization that time holds no meaning to you. This day will be filled with tributes on the television, over the radio, and across the Internet to those who fell in those terrorist attacks in New York City, Arlington/DC, and Stonycreek Township.

Last year, I wrote a remembrance to that horrible day eight years ago. I had written a tribute every year and I honestly thought about skipping a tribute this year. I couldn't see the point of rehashing and reliving that day. I couldn't find a reason for posting something. Besides, I couldn't think of anything more to add to what I've already said.

Except this.

Time has a nasty habit of dimming the memory, of easing the sense of urgency, of numbing the pain. With each year that passes, I fear that we lose the harsh, cruel lessons we learned on that day.

And for that reason I post this. That day is as real to me now as it was then. I haven't forgotten. I hope you never do either.

Random Music Tuesdays: "My Maria" by Brooks & Dunn

One of the longest running and biggest country music acts in the business is ending. Brooks & Dunn has decided that after twenty years of sweet music it is time to break up the band.

"This ride has been everything and more than we could ever have dreamed ... We owe it all to you, the fans," Kix Brooks and Ronnie Dunn said in the message. "If you hear rumors, don't believe them, it's just time."

While not a big fan myself, I do appreciate when musicians can play together and stay on top of their game for as long as these two men have. And so, in honor of such a long and illustrious career, I offer you one of their biggest hits.

Enjoy!

My Maria - Brooks & Dunn

More On Texting While Driving

Remember this? Apparently, the states cannot be trusted to make what laws they feel are best for their people ... thus this.

Random Music Tuesdays: "Common People" by William Shatner

Wait, Diarist. William Shatner?!

Yes. William Shatner.

Now I know this flies in the face of all that is good and wholesome in music. I know that Shatner is known more for the cadence of his delivery than for his singing chops. (Don't believe me? This live performance is infamous!) The absolute failure of his first music album should all but ensure that his name should never, ever grace anyone's music list.

Yet here is is. This week's Random Music Tuesdays choice for your listening pleasure. And he would never be here were it not for the saving grace, musical genius, and production skills of one auditory visionary who saw the potential in Shatner that none other in the universe could see.

And for that, Mr. Folds, I thank and salute you.

Because Has Been has got to be one of the best albums you've never heard or owned. (And if you have heard it and/or own it, you'll no doubt agree with me whole-heartedly.)

This isn't a review of the album. (Mostly because, if it were, it would be about five years late.) No, I believe that this album can speak for itself. There is so much heart, so much emotion, so much raw power in it to be ignored. And, like the Borg, resistance to it is futile.

I know you're still skeptical. That's why I've brought this offering. The opening track is such good fun ... and the vocals are so emotively powerful ... that all of your skepticism will be swept away. So listen to the track. Then buy yourself a copy and see what you've been missing these past five years.

Nassif Building Returns to Life

Well, it isn't the Nassif Building anymore. Now it's called the Constitution Center. And it's much prettier with this facelift.

Before ...



After ...



Now all they need is a tenant.

The New "Drinking And Driving"

A recent study has shown that texting while driving is not one of the best ideas.

After examining the behavior of truck drivers covering more than 6 million miles of road, the Virginia Tech Transportation Institute concluded that people who send text messages while driving are 23 times more likely to be in a crash (or what they call a near-crash event) than nondistracted drivers.

I have been guilty of texting while driving, though lately I've been severely curtailing my texting time to red lights. But even that is not a good idea, since fourteen states plus the District of Columbia have banned texting behind the wheel.

The message in all of this? Don't use your cell phone while driving unless it's an absolute emergency.

Too Soon?

My answer, in a word, is YES! People, there's a reason parks, monuments, airports, et cetera are named after people after history has borne out that person's worthiness of such an honor. It's so that we don't look back in embarrassment on an emotional mistake. I strongly urge my city council to postpone this proposal at least until the man is out of office.

Random Music Tuesdays: "Somnambulist (Simply Being Loved)" by BT

This week's featured song is by another hometown star, BT, who hails from Rockville, MD. It's probably his most famous song and holds the Guinness Book of World Records in 2003 for the largest number of vocal edits in a song . Plus it's catchy. So enjoy!

Somnambulist (Simply Being Loved) - BT

Random Music Tuesday: Michael Jackson

Today, in case you didn't know, was the final send-off for Michael Jackson. In honor of one of the world's greatest entertainers ever (and because I've already said my peace), I offer not a song from the man but something marginally better. Because while imitation may be the greatest form of flattery, spoofing is the greatest form of honoring.

"Weird Al" Yankovic - Fat

Busted ... Yet Again - UPDATED

It seems these days, my councilmember has been spending more time fighting for his freedom than he has been fighting for the benefit of the Ward he was elected to represent. I guess he simply has too much time on his hands ... and we all know what they say about idle hands.

Seriously, Ward 8, can we finally say enough is enough and elect someone who actually bring some positive attention to our neighborhoods instead of appearing in mug shots? Is there any way we can forcibly remove him from office? I know the man created the District Youth’s Employment Act of 1979 (a.k.a. "the summer youth work program"), which gave a great number of District residents their first job and important first steps toward a brighter future; but he's been riding that PR gravy train for thirty years. He has done nothing over the past twenty years but make our city (and our Ward) a punchline. He is an embarrassment and a distraction. He has to simply go away.

We need and deserve better than this.

UPDATE - 13:17: Right on cue, we have dueling stories. one version came from one of the horses' mouths. The alternate story came from the other horses' attorney's mouth.

The Stella Awards

I got an email today from a friend about this year's Stella Awards. I found the email so funny that I was going to post it on here. Unfortunately, while quite humorous, the list was totally bogus. So I found the real site with the real awards. And now, here for your ready pleasure, are the latest (2007) Stella Awards Runners-Up and Winner. (And, believe me, you'll love the winner since he's a hometown boy.)

The TRUE Stella Awards -- 2007 Winners
by Randy Cassingham
Issued February 2008

Unlike the FAKE cases that have been highly circulated online for the last several years (see http://www.StellaAwards.com/bogus.html for details), the following cases have been researched from public sources and are confirmed TRUE by the ONLY legitimate source for the Stella Awards: http://www.StellaAwards.com. To confirm this copy is legitimate, see http://www.StellaAwards.com/2007.html.

-v-

2007 Runners-Up and Winner:

#3: Sentry Insurance Company.

The company provided worker's compensation insurance for a Wisconsin "Meals on Wheels" program. Delivering a meal, a MoW volunteer (who was allegedly not even wearing boots) slipped and fell on a participant's driveway that had been cleared of snow, and Sentry had to pay to care for her resulting injuries. Sentry wanted its money back, so it sued the 81-year-old homeowner getting the Meals on Wheels service. It could have simply filed for "subrogation" from her homeowner's insurance company, but by naming her in the action, it dragged an old lady into court, reinforcing the image of insurance companies as concerned only about the bottom line, not "protecting" policyholders from loss.

#2: The family of Robert Hornbeck.

Hornbeck volunteered for the Army and served a stint in Iraq. After getting home, he got drunk, wandered into a hotel's service area (passing "DANGER" warning signs), crawled into an air conditioning unit, and was severely cut when the machinery activated. Unable to care for himself due to his drunkenness, he bled to death. A tragedy, to be sure, but one solely caused by a supposedly responsible adult with military training. Despite his irresponsible behavior -- and his perhaps criminal trespassing -- Hornbeck's family sued the hotel for $10 million, as if it's reasonably foreseeable that some drunk fool would ignore warning signs and climb into its heavy duty machinery to sleep off his bender.

But those pale in comparison to...

THE WINNER of the 2007 Stella Award: Roy L. Pearson Jr.

The 57-year-old Administrative Law Judge from Washington DC claims that a dry cleaner lost a pair of his pants, so he sued the mom-and-pop business for $65,462,500. That's right: more than $65 million for one pair of pants. Representing himself, Judge Pearson cried in court over the loss of his pants, whining that there certainly isn't a more compelling case in the District archives. But the Superior Court judge wasn't moved: he called the case "vexatious litigation", scolded Judge Pearson for his "bad faith", and awarded damages to the dry cleaners. But Pearson didn't take no for an answer: he's appealing the decision. And he has plenty of time on his hands, since he was dismissed from his job. Last we heard, Pearson's appeal is still pending.

Copyright 2008 www.StellaAwards.com -- this message may be forwarded as long as it remains complete and unaltered.

Good Morning ... WTF?! (Explosion On Good Hope Road SE)

My condo building was evacuated around 07:00 this morning by D.C. Fire and Rescue. One of the units on my floor exploded. I have no word yet on the cause of the blast. Only the owner of the unit was injured; his injuries were not life-threatening. The rest of us are standing around outside, waiting on more details of what happened. I hope to have more later.






















-- Post From My iPhone


UPDATE - 08:43: Around 08:00, we were allowed back into the building. It appears that roach bombs were the cause of the explosion. Apparently, the unit owner wasn't home when the exterminator visited our building a bit ago and so still had roaches. The unit owner had one roach bomb in the bathroom and two in the kitchen (in cabinets). The fire investigator believes that the stove's pilot light ignited the chemicals from the roach bombs. I was with Regina (the condo board president), Vernon (our maintenance guy), and 7th District Police Officer Schramm when they went into the unit. I took a look around (from the outside of the unit) and listened to their conversation. And let me tell you, we were lucky. The unit owner has crap piled up all over the place, with a couple walkways between the piles of crap. There were paint cans under the dining room table. There were all sorts of chemicals in the kitchen (where the explosion apparently originated). If any of those other chemicals had exploded ... if any one piece of the crap in that unit had caught fire ... well, this would have been a vastly different post.

Oh. Yeah. And the roaches survived the whole ordeal.

UPDATE - 15:08: My photos are on WJLA's website.

UPDATE - 03:47: DCist links to the WJLA website, siting that WJLA was reporting the story ... which is true ... except that The District Diaries reported it first (and as it happened) then tipped off WJLA.

Oh. Yeah. And yes, IntangibleArts, the bugs are all OK. For now.

Random Music Tuesdays: "You're The Only One" by Maria Mena

Okay, technically this a love song ... or at least a song about romantic relationships. But that's not how I was introduced to it. And that's not the message I took away from it. This week's song is about finding that person who gets you in ways that no one else in the universe ever possibly could.

Maria Mena's song "You're The Only One", from her 2004 album Mellow, was written as a love song. But this song was brought to my attention by First Brain. And he's the first person I think of when I hear it. Because to me, this isn't a romantic love song but a platonic one ... a song for those lucky people who have that person (friend, love, whatever) in their life who simply gets them ... no explanations, no excuses, no editing.

First Brain, this week's song goes out to you. I hope life treats you well and that you accept the best that life offers you.

Youre The Only One - Maria Mena

Love ...

...

1. requires constant communication and reassurance to flourish, much like how a plant needs light and water to grow.
2. is alive and subject to the same rules as any other life on earth.
3. is universal.
4. should not be attached to strings but far-too-often is.
5. , along with Time, can heal any wound.
6. is painful and worth every moment of it.
7. stands by you even when it isn't easy to do so.

... is not ...

1. vacuumed sealed.
2. universally understood.
3. up for negotiation.
4. to be taken for granted.
5. static.
6. limited to one plain of being.
7. to be hoarded away like a life's saving because ...

... Love is best spent on others, and ...

... Love is what you bring into my life and I cherish it more than I can often express.